The captain of life

For one year the language of the Netherlands was not spoken.
But being in Holland now, it is permanently Dutch words and sentences that are being used.
Fortunately the language of the Netherlands is not forgotten although sometimes an English way of saying things slips through.

Last night with friends, a couple, it was 5 hours of chatting.
Of course about relationships.

The friends have a sailing boat that they use in their spare time.
The rule is that the one at the rudder, is the one that gives the orders.
Hence, there is a captain and a sailor on board.
But it is not as simple.
When the woman is the captain, the male sailor sometimes doubts the commands.
And makes it a point of discussion.
And because women in the Netherlands are emancipated, when the man is the captain, his commands are sometimes openly doubted by the female sailor.

This is not a good situation on a sailing boat.
And also not on land in real life.
Part of command structure is that, no matter what, the authority is recognised and respected.
Maybe in a later stage, while reflecting and evaluating the decision made, it can be kept against the light.

The conclusion was that sailing was possible but only when it was in a relaxed way.
Not looking for challenges like participating in races and competitive sailing with other boats.
Because then the stress would strike and clear command structure would be definitely necessary.

It was remarked that a couple they knew that most of the time won the sailboat races had a man as a captain who was yelling and insulting the sailor who was his wife.
Because the man could express himself freely and the woman was able to swallow it, their sailing boat won all the time.
Hopefully that woman had a way of getting back at that man and balance the relationship.

It was a very interesting conversation about this subject.
Without the option of coming to clear conclusions.

Very different from an evening recently in Los Angeles: also with friends, a couple.
There the woman wanted very much to dominate her two male companions.
This was so intense and getting that much escalated that true fear was felt.
Fear that she, who did the cooking, would put poison in the food.
To kill the two men at her table.
That would have been a lousy death.
Because a certain woman wanted to be the captain of life.



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